Conversation no. 9: waiting for Mr. Right

Yes, the title is right. I AM waiting for Mr. Right. That’s what’s wrong with me, I think. I wait, I do not seek. Read through this recent conversation (via YM) with a friend:
ME: tingin mo, bakit hanggang ngayon wala pa akong asawa o boyfriend man lang? is it too much to ask for a decent man who has a good handle of life?
HER: either you haven’t seen the man who meets your standards, or you’re not willing to lower/compromise those standards for the men you’ve met
ME: yeah, it’s the second
HER: but ur in good company.  gloria steinem married in her 60s
ME: yikes. di na ko mag-e-enjoy nun (lol)
HER: up to you.  looking for good partners, whether gay or otherwise, has always been "the thrill of the hunt"
ME: that’s another thing. i’m not a hunter. i guess i’m too proud to do that
HER: who sezs u have to "hunt"? kung gusto mo ng mate just for the sake of having one, then just be prepared to pay for it. just socialize, my good dame!
ME: i socialize a lot. in fact, i did that too much when i was younger. ngayon nga lang ako nag-slow down e
HER: then again, look hus talking.  i met (my partner) through the classified ads! LOL
ME: talaga?
HER: yup. sa buy n sell pa nga yun e. "chinese lesbian looking for fellow lesbians, must not be younger than 32. reply to confibox no. ___" o diva, and love story ng buhay ko
ME: hahaha. that’s interesting
HER: still together after 13 years, and i still find myself wanting to go home to her. swertihan lang talaga i guess. though the horror stories of my many married gal pals makes me wonder what happened to the pinoy guy that made them such lousy husbands/fathers. i sometimes suspect it may be the way the women in their lives raised them/treated them. dati, pag may nirereto sa akin na lalaki, i always say, "I WANT A MAN, NOT A BOY IN DIAPERS!"
ME: hehe. from the unhappy married couples i know, i have made a conclusion that it all boils down to communication. most of the time, both the man and the woman want to talk and think that they actually listen to their partner. what they do is "hear" the other person talk, but not actually "listen" to what the person is saying. kapag ganun na ang nangyayari, walang understanding na nararating kaya hindi sila happy pareho.
HER: men are from mars/women are from venus syndrome
ME: yeah, something like that. kaya ako, ang hinahanap ko sa isang lalaki is someone who can engage me in a good conversation. someone who can sit down with me at the end of each day and share the beauty and atrocities of life
HER: a rancouteur? kelangan intelligent, well-read sya, at the very least
ME: one doesn’t have to be intelligent to engage in a good conversation. one only needs to have a good grasp of what life offers. kahit taxi driver na hindi nakapag-aral, basta may sense kausap, di ba masarap ka-chikahan?
HER: and how many men are that thoughtful, insightful?
ME: there are many men out there, but I think they’re taken kasi nga they’re good catch. madali kasi silang ma-detect, sa unang date pa lang. unang buka pa lang ng bibig, alam mo na kung binobola ka o hindi…unless starry-eyed girl ka na gustong magpa-bola sa lalaki. unfortunately, walang naliligaw along my side of the road
HER: then cross to the other side of the road! 
ME: i don’t hunt nga, di ba? naghihintay lang ako na may tumawid over to my side kasi pag ako ang tumawid, i might no like what that side of the road has to offer…hmmm…that makes me think…maybe THAT is my problem. TAMAD AKO
HER: there u are.  walang incentive yung chiken tumawid e
ME: chicken kasi. Duwag! Duwag sa commitment!
HER: there you are. take it slowly lang. nothing risked, nothing gained.

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7 thoughts on “Conversation no. 9: waiting for Mr. Right

  1. Interesting insight — particularly on men and women talking their heads off but not actually listening — cos they really don’t (kung may blinders sa tenga, thats what husbands and wives wear). They listen to what they want to hear, much like I do. However, that chicken has got to decide what it wants in life, otherwise it can end up wondering endlessly until it gets fried…or it can end up waiting for godot… chicken’s choice.

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  2. if this chicken’s destiny is to get fried, roasted, or grilled, so be it. Kapag naging lalaki ako sa next life, manliligaw ako agad pagka-panganak ko!

    May dagdag pa ako dyan sa hearing instead of listening…most couples prefer to watch than observe…guess rather than ask…conclude rather than understand….

    Haaay, relationships, parang itlog!

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  3. hello carmie! ngaun lng ulit ako ngkapgbasa ng mga blogs mo. galing talaga, idol talaga kita basta sa sulatan at sa pgsabi ng nararamdaman. I completely agree with you, pareho nga tayo pati sa qualities ng guy na gusto natin. hay…nga pala got your message from malen na unahin muna kita sa pghahanap ng boyfriend. sige na nga pero hindi rin kasi ako magaling mghanap. but i’m more open now, balak ko na makipagsocialized (hehehe balak ibig sabihn hindi ko pa rin nagagawa). guess i’m more scared than lazy.
    miss you all dyan sa weber. regards sa knila. say hi to Greis for me.
    God bless!

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  4. hahaha…yan naman ang gusto ko sa yo tere, masunurin ka sa matatanda. sige, good luck sa paghahanap. and thanks for reading my blogs. i’m glad you can relate to them. ingat ka dyan

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